There is a lot said about making friends, however there is much less said about keeping friendships. Yet there is a great art to keeping your friends.
Attribution: Pixabay - PDPics
It is all about how you spend your time with your friends and often we spend it poorly. Let's look at some of the ways we waste our friends and how we can treat our friends better.
Its about me
I know this guy who makes friends, spends hours talking about himself until they become sick of him and then he has to find new friends. He even seems to have strategies to turn every conversation into something about him: from injuries to family problems, there is always something for people to discuss that involves him.
Attribution: Pixabay - geralt
If you spend time with your friends to talk about yourself, your company is going to wear thin pretty quickly. Yes, you need to express yourself and share the things you enjoy, but time with friends can't just be about yourself.
I seem to have some friends with whom I can only be in contact when they have a problem. If you have friends only because they need your help or have something that they want to do, then they are not true friends.
Attribution: Pixabay - PublicDomainPictures
You don't have to be selfish but you don't have to lose yourself to your friends. There should always be a meeting in the middle. To be a good friend, spend time with people because you enjoy their company. If they have helped you, then this matters even more.
Sad & Lonely Time
This explains relationships more than it explains friendships. If you only hang out with others because being at home by yourself is hard, then all you are doing is bringing people your sadness and loneliness.
Atrribution: Pixabay - PDPics
Yes, friends care about each other and help each other feel better. But if you are going to see your friend it shouldn't be so that you are not lonely, it should be so you are making them feel better and because you have things you would love to be doing with them.
Its Friday, time for beers with workmates, its football season, time to watch football, etc etc. You are only seeing your friend because it is that time to see them.
Do you all really have something to do, or something to say? Real friendships are the ones we put time and effort into because we enjoy being with them.
I don't mind going out to noisy bars and clubs, but I like going there with people I already know because it is impossible to have a conversation there.
Attribution: Pixabay - stux
Party time is great, but you can't party all the time. So party on dudes, but remember to also chill, bro.
This works for me because I can be both boring and annoying. So if you spend a short time with me I will seem interesting and nice. Spend too much time with me and I become annoying.
Attribution: Pixabay - geralt
So friendship is about quality, not quantity. A little of you should go a long way.
Time well spent
Time spent with a good friend always feels like time well spent, while bad or selfish friends seem to drain you. Make sure you are filling your friends with energy and not being a social vampire.