To live life is to love people and is to lose some of them over the course of your lifetime. It is inevitable. It is all part of the circle of life.
The circle of life continues!
There are many people who don't know how to deal with loss. After years they can still mourn the loss of that special person. Then there are those who won't show how they feel, closing off part of their heart.
Have you lost someone? Your feelings will depend on who that person was to you.
The sun will rise again!
It is sad to lose talents like John Lennon, innovators like Martin Luther King Jr and Steve Jobs, or those from the silver screen who we loved and felt we knew, but this is not personal.
Both my parents are gone. Dad suffered for years with varying diseases and maladies. Mom went to bed one night and never woke up.
It is almost a relief when an ill person passes, they are no longer suffering. It is a complete shock to the system when a person is suddenly taken from you in the blink of an eye. Both are tragic, both leave your heart aching.
Then there is that special person who was your rock, understood you more than anyone else ever could, the love of your life? your sister, cousin, friend? It is devastating and painful. You wonder if you will ever get over it.
There will, however, come the day when it won't hurt so much. You will always miss them but you will be able to look into your heart and smile at the memories that live there.
Unless, you let it devour you!
Keep moving forward!
My parents were alcoholics most of my life, making me angry, resentful and hurt.
I attended meetings for Adult Children of Alcoholics when I was 40. They showed us how to deal with our anger. Writing letters to our alcoholic was a huge part of the healing. These letters were never given but brought great relief in being able to say the things that we could not or would not say to that person. It cleansed, allowed an outpouring of all emotions.
In 4 pages it was a journey through anger, tears, frustration, including abandonment issues and sorrow. It was easier to go on now, wanting to live for that person who could not live for themselves.
Life doesn't stop!
It can be the same moving past grief but you can do it. It is difficult to live if you live your life longing for the departed. Why not do what you need to do to get on with it? It is hard to admit if you are angry with them for leaving you, you may feel guilty, you may hold yourself responsible.
These are all feelings and emotions everyone carries. Counsellors can help you see your way past to the light on the otherside of your grief.
You can learn to deal and move forward. Write a letter, then another. Write it all down, stopping only when you are drained. Then pick yourself up and get on with the joy of living.
My parents are gone, and missed hugely, but they are free, dancing together in the light. I live for that comfort and for my own lovely joy filled life. You can too!