Are you a busy person? Do you look after your job, your family, your pets, mother, uncle, studies, house, garden, or the car?
Of course you do, and most people are really good at putting others first, looking after things that need to be done. And that is ok - sometimes.
We are always busy looking after everyone else!
It does become a problem when you don't allow any time for yourself; when you don't think about yourself and your needs.
It wasn't until a couple of years ago I realized that I was yelling at people in traffic. Well, I admit I have been doing that for a long time, but what I didn't realize was this was my mind's way of trying to tell me something. I never paid attention until one day I had to.
It hit me right between the eyes. I realized that when I was out of whack, hurrying here and there, not paying attention to my own needs that this would go on - and it would escalate until I was feeling badly about myself, resenting everything and everyone. It took a while to understand that I was attending to everyone else's needs and none of my own.
Not attending to your needs can leave you with an empty feeling!
It is really hard to admit that this can happen to one's self. It becomes a primary need, almost an urgency, an opening up to what is going on inside. If you choose to take a look inside, you find that you need to love yourself as much as you love and care for everyone else.
Does this sound selfish? It is supposed to. In the past being selfish always carried a negative context. Look at it in this way - self -ish. You are only looking after your inner world. This is a good, positive thing that brings you back to yourself.
You need to think of yourself!
If you are going to have a crazy, busy day, take yourself out for a walk. Listen to the birds, smell the flowers, breathe the air, give yourself a bit of time to just be. It is surprising how far this goes in creating your well-being. This is a good kind of selfish. This is looking after yourself, giving yourself permission and time. Then you can come back with a fresh perspective.
Walk away and take a break!
If you can't walk, sit with a coffee, breathe and be thankful. A moment here or there works wonders. Be present on your walk from the bus stop, this can be the time for yourself.
This is something I still strive to do, because I forget. Then I find myself yelling at people in traffic again so I come back and try again. It is all in the trying, and keeping going and working at it, until it becomes second nature and you find it easier to put your needs first, so that you can truly love yourself, and the people in your life, and then there is no more yelling at people in traffic.
When you put yourself first, everything else falls in to place and it can be beautiful!
Life is then joyful and loving. When you learn to put yourself first, everything else falls in to place.