Once upon a time a handshake was given as your word. It was a trusted way to deal with people and do business. It was your bond, and it was a usual occurrence.
What's in a handshake?
You would also shake someone's hand in greeting when you met them for the first time. This practice still stands today.
Now it's interesting to discover that these days there seems to be a lot of interpretation when it comes to handshaking. There seems to be 3 different versions.
The first handshake resembles a limp fish. Where this came from is a mystery. This person moves their hand towards you but is in no way engaged in the action, really they may as well not even be there. They can't seem to hide their boredom or distaste at having to shake someone's hand so they give you their hand but there is no firmness, no commitment, and no interest in the
What does this first impression mean? Well, in my opinion, this person is non-committal, has no interest in anything you are offering or in the way they come across. Maybe, they are just somewhere else in the moment, are afraid to catch your germs or lack social skills. Either way, it is hard to take this person seriously.
Does this bug you?
The second handshake is the strong arm handshake. I bet you know the one. You offer your hand to someone and they squeeze it so hard they mash the bones of your hand together, not pleasant. It has been my absolute dismay to be at the receiving end of this kind of handshake.
How does this person measure others?
Does this show that this person is trying to tell you that they are in charge, that they hold the power? Again, in my opinion, I feel they are having personal issues and don't even know it. It does nothing to endear you to this person and it certainly makes you question them. And it is not only men who do this.
Over the years women have really had to prove themselves in business, and understandably, the need to show themselves as powerful in a man's world has not been an easy task. However, is it necessary to demean, or disconcert another person to try to prove who is the more powerful? This act can destroy trust, before it is even built. It will stop a friendship long before it starts.
The handshake of old is to be firm, yet not bone crushing, or limp fished. It is a mutual and subtle way of sharing between two people who have just met. It holds promise, consideration and new ventures to be had.
It holds promise!
If you want to handle fish or arm wrestle there are other places and ways of doing it.
Have you had these experiences?
It would be interesting to hear other people's opinions on this subject.
Are you inclined to shake hands as mentioned above? Maybe you want to practice shaking hands so that it can be a more authentic show of who you really are, not the bored one or the death match contestant but the genuine human being that lives within you.