I host a monthly fiction challenge, and it’s amazing how often women write “I wouldn’t be able to do that” without even trying, or “Here’s my lame attempt” as a preface to a perfectly fabulous story. We humans all seem to have a heavy helping of self-doubt built into us.
Whenever we look at our dream and decide to back away from it before we even try to make it happen, we are continuing a self-defeating cycle. We need to start to question our fears and take control. Self-doubt killed more dreams than failure ever did.
Some fear is helpful, as it is a protection mechanism. However, we need to question all fear, to see if it is valid. If the fear is saying to ourselves “I won’t be any good at it so I may as well not bother”, then we need to ask “Why not? Why won’t I be able to do it?” You’d be surprised to find out you often can’t answer that. If there is no risk involved, other than ego, and no valid reason why you can’t achieve what you’re trying to do, then you need to shout down that fear and continue on your way.
For some reason, the older we get, the stronger our fear grows. I think it has sat in our ear unchallenged for so long that it has expanded beyond logical argument. We listen to what our mind says without ever questioning it but we don’t need to believe everything we think.
Ultimately, if we try and fail, what harm is done? We can always just try again. And again. The power of the fear is not that we fail, but that it stops us from trying.
Remember if you can change your focus, you’ll change your life.
“Miracles start to happen when you give as much thought and energy to your dreams as you do your fears” – Unknown.
So start to think of all the reasons you can, not why you can’t. At all times, ask “Why not me?”
Great words here, thank you for the reminder - we all have the opportunity to do our best! May we always take that opportunity!
My writing group has a rule - if you rubbish your own work, you have to put some money into our tin. You can say something like - "This is the first draft and needs more work", but if you said something like, "I'm no good at poetry, but here's my poor attempt" then you'd have to put money in the tin.
It's a rule that works well, those present are careful to not bag their work and everyone has a go at our writing exercise, whether or not it's something they consider themselves to be good at.