All moments shape us, and how we think. Just as the weather conditions form the sunset, all things, big or small, form new habits or behaviour to avoid. It's not just big traumatic moments. We are the sum of a million tiny moments and we build on that with every minute of every day. Ultimately we are shaped by our experience, even if it is our aim to try and change the way it is shaping us.
The good news is it doesn't condemn us. It's not necessarily an unavoidable burden or pattern set in stone. We can change. It is easy for us to change. At any point in time, we can take a different path or decide to model a new behaviour. It's not the huge hurdle we think it is, we just need to add that moment of decision into the pile of moments that creates our experience.
You can turn over a new leaf at any moment. A new way of thinking or tiny action creates a new beginning. It will happen unheralded, you may not even be aware it's happening but in time you will look back and see you've changed.
Intellectually we scare ourselves away from change, as it seems so difficult or scary. Yet it is simply just another one of those moments that pile up and shape us over time, one where we do it differently this time.
If you fail, decide again, and again if need be. It's as simple as that. We are constantly evolving, or should be. It's up to us if we want to bloom. As Winston Churchill said "To improve is to change, to be perfect is to change often."